Who are you?
by Susaga
Summary: A new boy rivals with Bakura and a new threat rivals with earth. May include Whipped cream, toilets, dueling, use of the word crap and a bad guy named... COMPLETED
1. st call of destruction

"O.K class," said Yugi's teacher. "We have a new student here today. He refuses to say his real name so call him Septem Stone. Class starts in 10 minutes."

"So Yuge, why do you have a newspaper here?" asked Joey.

"Granpa gave it to me after he read the review for the new exhibit on the sarcophagus found with two others in a tomb with only Set on the wall" answered Yugi, "briefly".

"Fifty p a punch" called Yami Bakura. "Punch now, pay never!"

"Yeah, I love to punch Bakura" called Septem stopping Bakura getting others to punch him. "You know my name but you don't know I was born in September on day seven, or as the French say, Sept."

Bakura and Septem had a little war from then. Bakura wrapped Septem in toilet paper from head to toe saying "now everyone will know you like Egyptology". Septem struck back with a bead necklace saying "looks better than that ugly thing".

After Bakura put Septem's foot in the toilet, a cloaked guy threw a slab of stone and it hit Joey. He then ran to attack.

"_The ultimate evil will enter this earth"_

The dark man jumped over the gate and vanished. Septem then smashed through the toilet window with a toilet on his left foot.

"Sorry, toilet problems."

"_Review or face a black planet"_


	2. nd attack

"Granpa, I'm home" called Yugi. "Our teacher said we can get out early because a man got a stone tablet and threw it at Joey."

"And the lump was so big I couldn't get into the classroom."

"Joey's hurt?" said Granpa. "That's great, I mean awfully good. Oops, I meant is terrible. Who's this?"

"The name is secret, but Septem's what everyone calls me."

"Were you my teacher in collage?" asked Granpa.

"No, I get held back an awful lot" he answered. "I'm still for new trends."

"_I challenge you to a duel" said the cloaked guy._

"I accept" called Yugi as the pharaoh.

"_I summon Seven Armed Fiend" said a familiar voice. "I also play Destiny Board."_

"Doesn't Bakura own those cards?" asked Tristan.

"Serenity has those cards too" said Joey.

"No, she has the five pieces of Exodia" said Tea.

Yugi knew that Bakura was the one duelling him so he picked up a tooth pick to throw at the hood of the duellist's cloak. No doubt that it was Bakura.

Yugi won with an attack on Bakura's second Seven Armed Fiend with a Dark Magician and an attack on Bakura's life points with Buster Blader. It was done.

"Let's celebrate with whipped cream for beating the bad guy with a new record" suggested Joey.

"_Don't call Checkmate after defeating a pawn. The king is what counts"._

"What did you say?" asked Joey.

"I get… controlled by evil people" said Septem.

"_People believe anything like **I won't kill them**. How **gullible** can you get? You will die if you don't review."_


	3. rd chapter with cheese

It started to snow as soon as Septem started to go home. He saw one land on his hand so he got a sledge hammer and started to pummel it. More cane and he got a block of iron and destroyed it. Even more came and he slightly over-reacted a little.

"AAAGGGHHH!" he screamed. "It's an alien invasion murdering and freezing innocent people. Taking over our bodies and controlling our minds. Were doomed!" See, hardly over reacting.

"Your not used to the cold, are you?" asked Tristan.

"I just came over from Egypt" Septem answered. "But I bet you're not used to an alien invasion."

"It's snow. Frozen rain. Harmless" explained Tea.

"They've gotten to your mind and made you cover up the truth" said Septem.

"NOOOOOO!" cried Joey. "I'm too young to die. Take Tristan but spare me. Please."

"Calm down" said Septem. "It's only snow."

"I thought you thought they were aliens," said Yugi.

"Don't blame me, blame the author" said the dingbat.

Hay, no saying that.

"What are you going to do about it?" said Septem. "Bring the big cheese to capture me."

Good idea. Thank you story.

"Hello" said Big Cheese who must have been on a diet as he looked different. "I'm the big cheese the author got to capture you Septem."

So he did.

"Phase one complete" said a mysterious man. "Suspicion leads off me."

"Good so why is my codename Big Cheese. Why not use my real name."

"What's that?"

"You know, M-"

**Note:** I will leave this part of the chapter to stop you knowing their identity. This is a suspense story after all.

I skipped out the end of the chapter and the next one. Oops.

To fill up chapter time, the story's trailer will be chapter 4.


	4. Special edition Trailer

As I said, this is a trailer for the story.

Two new faces (insert Septem and the bad guy's faces).

Two new mysteries (Silhouette of the bad guy and Septem with whipped cream up nose).

But are they (insert flash).

**_Yugioh!_**

**_Who are you?_**

Armageddon might not be enough practice.

Could Yugi Moto, Joey Wheeler, Tristan Taylor, Tea Gardner, Seto Kaiba, Duke Devlin and the other characters will use all their skills to beat a new threat with a mysterious new friend, Septem?

We shall see.

I gave you a trailer so you give me a review.


	5. The hunt

I hope you're happy. I only got one review and a scary dude said to me he will extinguish the sun to make a black planet if I don't get him a review or email. He isn't lying.

"I'll get Septem back from the big cheese" said Tea.

"Where could we find him?" asked Tristan.

"Hey look" said Yugi. "The museum has a broken window and had a sign saying 'Black Planet'. Let's go there."

"I know it looks cool but were trying to find Septem" said Joey. "Why are you all staring at me?"

"They are coming Sir" said Big Cheese.

"I know Big Cheese."

_Museum entrance_

"Hay Yuge" said Joey. "If we duel, they may see our cards."

"Good idea" said Yugi as he turned into Yami.

"For once" added Tristan.

_A long time after the duel started. Yami got Joey to 2450 L.P. while staying at 1250._

"I will not duel you this intensely Joey" said Yami.

"So surrender and hand over your duelling title" said Joey.

"Freeze!" shouted big cheese turning Joey into an Egyptian wall picture. "He had to be frozen as he would out evil me. As for Septem, he is here."

"Joeys evil wasn't set in stone" said Septem trying to joke.

"Shut up!" shouted Big Cheese. He threw him back to the new exhibit. "Anubis was crap compared to your next battle."

"Septem!" shouted Yugi after he changed back.

_Yugi's mind_

"Don't go there" said Yami.

"Scared of sarcophaguses."

"No, I'm suspicious about-"

"Septem is in danger. We have to help him."

"O.k. But don't say I didn't warn you."

Review to say who you think the major bad guy is. You won't get it. Prove me wrong.


	6. Pieces of the puzzle

_Get ready for a night of black tonight._

Uh, mean dude, night is always black.

_That's what you think!_

On to the story and, you don't know, you don't know.

"Seto!"

"I'm glad you know my name Yugi!" he said. "Let's duel!"

Yugi used his three knight combo to summon obelisk but Kaiba used snatch steal to control obelisk and metamorphosis to turn obelisk into blue eyes ultimate dragon.

"Megamorph!" cried Seto. "Now my beast, neutron blast."

"Sorry if magic cylinder stops me losing damage and wipes you out" said Yugi who won't change into the Pharaoh as Yugi won't listen to Pharaoh.

He ran on and saw Duke Devlin.

"Chosen one" he called. "Argots the relentless (is that how you spell it?), I end my turn."

"Bad reaction to Samuchi" called Yugi. "Three rains of mercy but you lose 3000 life points instead. Upstart goblin ends the duel."

_Yugi's mind_

"Yugi, please listen to me" said Yami.

"Not till I know Septem is safe."

"Yugi!"

"What!"

"I don't want to lose you, not again"

"Whoa, this **is** a complex mind" said Septem in Yugi's mind. "_Aw. You actually care that he will die when he beats Big Cheese. I'm a spell caster."_

He vanished as soon as he came.

_Museum entrance_

"Bakura! What are you doing here?" asked the stone Joey. Apparently, the magic let him talk and hear things.

"I'm here to put Septem's right foot in a toilet again" he replied.

"Again!" shouted Tristan as confused as Joey. "What do you mean again? You put his left foot in the toilet."

"No, I put the right one in."

_Yugi's mind_

"Yugi, I saw a flash when the attacker disappeared which went from the spot where the attacker vanished to the window Septem fell out of."

"Probably detected magic."

The mean dude will die of shock if you review, possibly.

_Darn! You know my weakness! You didn't hear that, right?_


	7. Dark Pyramid

This virus is getting worse so review.

Yugi saw him. A man in the big cheeses robe who was definitely not big cheese stood before him. He said "Master Ranah has disobeyed me. Let's duel and the pharaoh cannot duel while you're on your winning streak."

"That voice is too familiar."

"I summon asura priest. Now I play Dark Pyramid. I may have to sacrifice a monster with Priest in its name but I can summon Hoten and Hoi. Your move."

"I summon gazelle. Attack."

It pounced towards Hoi only to get destroyed. Dark Pyramid had an ability to destroy all attacking monsters before they attack. It made an invisible maze. Hoi's effect made Yugi lose 500 life points when a monster got destroyed.

_Outside that pyramid like the Pyramid of Light_

Joey turned back to normal.

"I'm back."

"NOOOO!" cried Bakura.

"How did you turn -?" started Tea, only to be disturbed by someone.

"By my hand" he said.

"Septem, you're O.K." said Tristan.

"Oh I'm fine, but I'm not Septem."

Please review. I'll give you chocolate.


	8. A New face

You may bloody notice I haven't bloody updated in a bloody long time, and you bloody haven't bloody reviewed in a bloody long time so when you bloody review I will bloody update this bloody story. On to the bloody story.

"So if your not Septem, who are you?" said Tristan.

"Tinstoil Seflantbeak!" said the man.

"Sorry but I don't speak Vietnamese" said Tea.

_A magical flashback in their minds_

They see a duel between Septem and his brother.

"Let's duel for more intense stuff, but what?" said one of the two identical twins.

"Wait! You want to rule the world and my magic is the only thing stopping you. Why don't we make an eternal bet so if you ever beat me in a duel, my magic will fade?"

"How will you keep your word?"

"When a magician makes a word, he is bound!" He drew an x on his chest and it turned vivid black!

_End flashback_

"So Septem is in there duelling to get better at stopping you rule the world?" said Joey.

"No!"

"He's being controlled by things!" said Tristan

"No! Yin Yang Yashibar!" Only Yin came out of the mysterious man, the yang came out of the Dark Pyramid.

"My family couldn't afford 2 Yin-Yang's so they bought one and cut it in half" said the man. He showed his chest along with…

A Black X!

Bloody review or I'll bloody send a bloody virus.


	9. 3rd chapter with cheese cont

These next two chapters are a little odd, if you haven't guessed.

"So are you good or bad?" said Bakura.

"Ugh! I'm talking to idiots! Hay! Author guy!"

I have a name!

"Sorry! Unfortunate duellist! I think it is a good time to show the end of '3rd chapter with cheese'"

Sorry. I didn't hear that right.

"Please!"

That's better.

_3rd Chapter with cheese cont_

"Phase one complete" said a mysterious man. "Suspicion leads off me."

"Good so why is my codename Big Cheese. Why not use my real name?"

"What's that?"

"You know Master Ranah, or just Ranah!"

"Because you're my brother!"

"How did you forget my name anyway? And why is a guy full of yin working for a guy full of yang, Septem?"

"1. I decided to call you big cheese. 2. I have tricks up my sleeve, but they are really hard to get out my sleeve."


	10. Yashibar 4 and Mystery Solved 10

Chapter 4 will fill this chapter and a bit of the ending.

_It's my favourite chapter!_

1. You only like it because it is one of the major evil chapters and 2. I postponed it by 6 WHOLE CHAPTERS, well almost.

"I still don't understand how you got me to work with you" said Ranah.

"Do you want me to allow the yin-yang yashibar to work?"

"So that's how! What about Yugi?"

"At this rate, he'll befriend a pole. Hmmm! I thought of a prank. Get me a pole!"

"Get it for yourself Septem!"

"But I'm too lazy!"

"Then hire Marik because I quit!"

"Ying Yang Yashi-"

"You don't even have that card!"

"I'll get it!"

"It's a puzzle to get it!"

"I'll solve it!"

"You're as bad at puzzles as you are at decks!"

"You're FIRED!"

"I ALREADY QUIT!"

"Thank you. Come again."

"YOUR NOT APOO FROM THE SIMPSONS!"

_Italics_

"No way! It's Septem!" said Tristan.

"Thank you captain obvious" said Bakura.

"Yugi! It's Septem" said Joey.

The duel went on a lot.

"Polymerization! Dark Paladin!"

"Yugi!"

"Pharaoh, is that you?"

"I'm surprised too!"

"Ranah. He's at it again" said Septem.

"Anyway, attack" cried Yugi.

"Dark pyramid, activate."

"Dark Paladin destroys magic cards so he can destroy Hoten" said Yami.

Dark Paladin/5900 – Hoten/900 5000. Septem/4900. Yugi wins!

You can still review. Oh Septem's deck turned to dust and he vanished. He learned to check his deck for flaws and will return to find the yin yang yashibar. As for Ranah, he returned to Egypt and came back to domino city after Yugi and the gang turned 25.

** The End**


End file.
